Puppy & Chantalle Blikman

Saying No Doesn’t Mean You’re a Bad Person

Saying no doesn’t mean that you are being rude, selfish, or unkind. These are all unhelpful beliefs that make it hard to say no.

Learning where these beliefs have come from is a great way to learn to let go of them.

Did you ever wonder why it was so easy to say no when you were a little kid and why it has become so difficult now? What happened?

Well, as a child, we learned that saying no was impolite or inappropriate.

If you said no to your mum, dad, teacher, uncle, grandparents, and so on, you were most certainly considered to be being rude, and you would have probably been told off for it.

Saying no was off limits, and yes was the polite and likable thing to say.

Now that we are all adults, we are more mature and capable of making our own choices, as well as knowing the difference between wrong and right. Therefore, no shouldn’t be an off limits word, but rather something that we decide on ourselves, based on our own discretion.

But sadly, we hold onto our childhood beliefs and we continue to associate no with being dislikeable, bad mannered, unkind, or selfish. We worry that if we say no, we will feel humiliated, guilty, or ashamed, and will end up being alone, rejected, or abandoned.


Knowing Your Value

The second step to learning to say no is realizing that you are valuable, and choosing your own opinion about yourself over others.

I have learned that if you live your life depending on other people’s approval, you will never feel free and truly happy.

If you depend on other people’s approval, what you are basically saying is “Their opinion of me is more important than my opinion about myself.”

If your opinion of yourself is actually quite low, remember that:

  • Your problems do not define you.
  • It’s okay to make mistakes—nobody is perfect, and everybody does things that they regret; this is what makes us human.
  • What makes a person great is not their looks or achievements, but their willingness to love others, be humble, and grow as a person.
  • You are unique, valuable, and important. No one else in this world can offer what you can.






Of course Sweden has it’s problem!!
Probably a lot worse problems than Iceland, Canada, Costa Rica etc etc..
But we also have things most people wouldn’t dream of.
If we excl the immigrant factor here..

(Yes Sweden has immigrants all over. Sorry to hear that some people have issues with them. I don’t. Now blame me for something stupid.)

We have payed education. Yes we take loans etc like most other people in the world.
But between 30 – 60% of the loans we can take, we get. We get money into our pockets. Yay us.


We have racists rapists, murderers and child molesters…
Like all countries. I’ve never met one tho..
We have different religions and once again.. The Swede LOVES to complain on things that aren’t theirs. Like Mosques for eg. But that’s a Swedish “hate thing”.
If it’s not ours.. We hate it.
Just like Americans way to see things.
And many other countries way ofc.

Also we have a healthcare that is somewhat slow..
But it works wonders. Swedish people just LOVE to complain when they ain’t first in line of getting help.
But we sure get it. We just like to find problems where there are none.
We also have stuff that to some people don’t matter.
Like the best, fastest, most stable internet in the world per capita.

We have a lot of Swedish traditions and such. To bad the average Swede never hesitates to be more like a rebel and not attend to those or even think about our special holidays and blah blah.

We have the “Social Styrelsen”. Who gives homes to people that have none
(Nobody except those who want it has nowhere to live).
They also provide economic stability for those who has none.
(Once again.. Only those who refuse help get’s no help)
In time.

Things take time like I stated. but we get what we “have the right to get” and even more.

We all have issues and social medias etc are very good at pointing fingers at whatever it is.
It’s 2016 now and Sweden has immigrants. We’ve had them since the fucking 30’s.
It’s 2016 and people are voting for Trump.. Ok. No big deal. Have it your way.
It’s 2016 and China still cooks puppies for breakfast and they run over people on the street twice because of insurgency issues..
And it’s 2016 and North Korea is still North Korea.

Please shut your holes, stop your drama-mind now and consider the facts..
Sweden is good. The Swedish people are good. But bad things happens to everyone.
Like “Swedistan and it’s issues”..

I didn’t make it that way.
The world did it.

Thank you.

Just a little something for my friend Lizzy.

When it’s dark and cold, remember that there’s always a glowing star out there. A star that is shining so strong and hot. All alone it floats along in this universe without reason or meaning. But then we humans look up upon this lonely star and we have given it a name, a reason and a meaning. We have given them a solar system with planets and maybe even life.

You are never alone in the dark. But we are both too afraid and too worried about our self.
We are scared of what may be if nobody comes to our aid. We fear that nobody cares..

Yet.. Out there.. There are billions of stars that are glowing with energy and one day that energy of light and heat reaches our eyes. And there it stops.

It finds a way. It finds it’s goal. And it gives hope and meaning to something that didn’t have either.

The feeling of being alone is so hard to explain because we never understand the true “meaning” of loneliness.

But loneliness is just that. A feeling. Nothing else.

Because when you gain enough comfort in yourself and enough courage..
Then you will see that light reaching out for you.. Telling you “You are not alone”.

And a smile will grow upon your face.
Warm and soothing.

“Loneliness is the first step to knowledge about the facts of not being alone”

And I hope you can understand this one day Lizzy.

And I hope you can be that light to someone else as well.

One day.

Och tills den rädsla som jag har i mig tar slut

Ibland så vill jag få dig
Att brista ut i gråt
Ibland så vill jag nå dig
Och viska tyst förlåt

Ibland kan jag förstå dig
Och jag ser hur svårt du har
Jag har sett när kärleken når dig
Och när ingenting finns kvar
Som båtar utan roder
Vi söker varsin vän
En syster och en broder
Men elden flammar upp igen

Men när vi rör varann’är klänslan alltför sann
Och med slutna ögon
Gömmer jag mig
Då vill jag ta dig i min famn
Tills du ropar högt mitt namn
Och tills den rädsla
Som jag har i mig tar slut

Where is the love?

What’s wrong with the world, mama
People livin’ like they ain’t got no mamas
I think the whole world addicted to the drama
Only attracted to things that’ll bring you trauma
Madness is what you demonstrate
And that’s exactly how anger works and operates
Man, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y’all, y’all
It just ain’t the same, old ways have changed
New days are strange, is the world insane?
If love and peace are so strong
Why are there pieces of love that don’t belong?
I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder
As I’m gettin’ older, y’all, people gets colder
Most of us only care about money makin’
Selfishness got us followin’ the wrong direction
Wrong information always shown by the media
Negative images is the main criteria
Infecting the young minds faster than bacteria
Kids wanna act like what they see in the cinema

Good Night

When the mind is filled with dirt and dust, the heart now feel like busted crust, no more light will shine through my eyes, all i see is sadness and lies..
The night is young and I am not..
The things that’s been said will not be forgot.
Good night.